Wednesday, June 6, 2012

What Is the Goal of Sewing?

I've been trying to pack things up for our temporary move to San Francisco, and taking it as an opportunity to simultaneously clean out my closets. Yes, closets. Not only do I have my closet in our bedroom with my regular clothes, I have the closet in our guest bedroom for storing costumes and some of my more fantastic, unlikely to be worn dresses. I'm supposed to clear out a closet for our subletter, which is prompting me to wonder...what is the point of all the sewing I've been doing? Wait, what? how did I get to that question from packing?

See, as I've been trying to pick out clothes to donate, I've been faced with a slightly more preliminary question: what is the value of something me-made? I've got several tops, dresses, and skirts that I made when I was first learning to sew, and while they came in handy during me-made month challenges or laundry emergencies, they are not loved and spend most of their time languishing in the corners of my closet. And yet, I feel hesitant about donating them. Will the eventual owner know that I spent hours planning fabric choice and pattern marriage, lovingly sewing, reluctantly hemming? Or will they just pick up my third skirt and wonder why the seams inside aren't serged? Even though I don't love these garments, it seems unbearable to think about someone else disdaining the time and effort I spent in making them. In other words, I can hate my sewing babies, but nobody else is allowed to.

I see you disdaining my ugly babies, you smug Tim Gunn of a cat. You stop it. Stop it right now.

But it remains that these garments are taking up space in my closet, and they're just not getting worn. Add to it that my fabric choices back then were on the more abysmal, polyester, or quilting cotton side of things, and it seems unlikely that I would take them apart for the yardage. Also, I know that I would much rather make something new with the tasty fabrics I've been dreaming about, instead of going back to revisit a leftover. Nobody ever cheers on Leftovers Night (although I adore leftovers for breakfast...but I'm not sure how that metaphor translates into sewing).

So if the choice is between something relatively well-made-but-RTW, and something not-so-well-made-but-slaved-over-by-me, both rarely worn and taking up closet space, which do I donate? Does being me-made give an item enough value to compensate for its being not-quite-my-thing? I guess that depends, then, on what I want my wardrobe to be about. Do I want my wardrobe to be beautiful, functional, all things that I would feel proud and happy to be wearing (and which may or may not, but more likely will, include RTW things)? Do I want my wardrobe to be all about me-made, even if there are some things I don't love? Is the point of teaching myself to sew so that I can be apparel-ly self-sufficient, capable of making all levels of clothing, from outerwear in to unmentionables? Am I learning to sew purely for the intellectual exercise of it, the challenge of learning to fit pants and, one day, tailor a suit, even if I don't wear suits? Is it just to save money, because thrift-store-sheet-therapy is cheaper than retail therapy, except that cost of notions and the amount of fabric in my stash probably negates any savings? Do I sew just for the frosting, and should I feel bad about my lack of enthusiasm for sewing cake?

Some people are determined to learn to do everything for themselves, from canning their own fruits and vegetables to raising their own chickens/eggs, from weaving cloth to making it into apparel, from building their own furniture to baking their own dog biscuits. I don't know if I'm one of those people, despite what Elaine or Emily may think. I want to sew my own wardrobe, but only if it's a good one, and I don't really feel the need to be bothered with lingerie just yet. And I don't have room to hold onto everything I've made, so I guess it's time to say goodbye to those first, ugly, babies. Maybe someone else will enjoy them, or, given the quality of construction/fabric, more likely someone else will do me the favor of tossing it into the rubbish bin, without burdening me with the knowledge of it. I can pretend that someone out there is enjoying that hideous, unevenly hemmed polyester mesh skirt. And I can hold onto that nice blouse that I probably could make if I really tried, only it just doesn't seem worth the effort when I think about trying to find a comparable fabric, drafting a pattern, and sewing it up with all the proper finishing even without a serger, just so that I can say that my wardrobe is me-made. I have better things to do with my time, and I want to enjoy my hobby, not turn it into something like cooking*, so a sewing diet of mostly frosting (with cake, only when I actually want to make it) it shall be. Who knows, one day I may be seized with the desire to make my own unmentionables.

Sewing this kind of cake was fine, though.

On another note, thank you to all of you who had such nice things to say about my blogiversary! I really enjoyed reading all of your comments and felt very encouraged and warm and fuzzy. I used to want to be an artist and a writer when I was in elementary school, and then my parents' practicality got in the way and I ended up majoring in science. But through blogging my creative projects, I feel like I'm getting to live that dream a little bit! And in case you didn't catch it, the pattern giveaway is still open for another couple days; nobody seems to want poor set #2, so you've got a great chance if you fancy those patterns!


*I realized recently that while I love eating good food, I don't actually enjoy cooking all that much. It's not at the bottom of my list of tolerable chores, but it's certainly not a hobby for me either. My husband actually likes cooking, and will experiment with new recipes when he has the time, but I would rather just make the same TNT recipes so that I can get eating out of the way, and have more time for truly fun things (at least for me) like reading and sewing. Baking is slightly more fun, but only just.

32 comments:

  1. I applaud your tough decisions. I am also going through a wardrobe purge, and while I don't have many me-made items yet, I am taking the approach that if it doesn't get worn and doens't make me feel awesome (RTW or Me-Made), it is going to donations.

    I may take apart one of the first dresses I made and use the fabric to make a sewing tool organizer or some gift bags for the holiday season (instead of wrapping paper).

    Perhaps, if you are worried about the fate of those less-loved Me-mades, you could see if any crafting friends are interesting in the material. Maybe you know someone who quilts? Or who makes hand-sewn gifts?

    Good luck with the temporary move!

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    1. Oh, I wish I had some crafting friends I could give the material to! But as far as I know, I'm the only one with urges to turn fabric into other things. I don't really like making non-apparel things out of fabric so I doubt I would ever turn old dresses into organizers and such, but props to you for recycling/reusing!

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  2. I have a few of those types of items I made years ago too. I really don't like them (and I have a serger now) but I really doubt anyone would want them. I think I've been hanging on to some of them in hopes that my nieces or future children of my own will at least like the fabric enough for their own beginning projects and I won't have trouble letting them cut them up. It's almost embarrassing to donate them because I know how bad they are.

    I know that I sew because it is an engineering challenge and that's the way my brain is wired, so I find it fun. Maybe it is the same for you. I also like being able to see physical proof that I have accomplished something. (I only do lingerie sewing if absolutely necessary - it is no fun unless you can show your work to others!)

    And yes! Cooking is so boring - I did not get the cooking gene that my dad and sister have! I find that eating is somewhat pointless because I will just be hungry again, and I hate trying to decide what I want. Being feed when I'm working on set for a film shoot really spoils me since they have catering, but it is AWFUL when I have to decide on meals myself when I'm not on a show! (I wish my husband liked to cook but he's just as bad with meal planning as I am.) Half the time, I'm happy with a bowl of cereal for dinner. (Sad, huh?)

    I do enjoy baking though - probably because it is more artist and involves frosting, hehe.

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    1. Hahaha oh yes, embarrassed donations...that's my early projects all the way, with wavy seams and no finishing. I would keep them around for small human beings later, except that our tiny apartment has no space for that kind of thing.

      I love the engineering aspect of sewing! My favorite is trying to figure out how to turn 2D fabric into a garment for a 3D body; my mental spatial reasoning has gotten much better. Thanks for affirming the unnecessary nature of lingerie sewing and cooking!

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  3. It is a tough call, isn't it? I need to do a similar closet-edit pretty soon. I think you're right, though---sewing is a hobby, it should be about the things that are fun for you to sew. For myself, that actually includes a lot of cake---I like sewing practical things I can wear all the time. But that's not how everyone feels, and that's fine (it's not like I'm not going fancy-dress-crazy at the moment...)

    Fellow loather of cooking, here. My husband is a bit more into it, but if it weren't for the children, we would eat toast at least three nights a week.

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    1. Oh how I wish I loved sewing cake! I look at your jeans and just sigh. I don't have children, but if I didn't have a husband in b-school who comes home ravenous I would settle for bread and cheese all day, every day. He's not buying the "Just pretend we're shepherds on the Swiss Alps like Heidi!" reasoning.

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  4. I've been having similar thoughts along the vein of being a scientist (well, barely, but that's a different story) and wanting to shift my entire career into a more creative outlet. It's really hard to even fathom how I can get it done. My friend is an amazing artist and he says he wasn't always so talented, he has just been working hard for a long time at what he does. Every day he draws with purpose for an hour. I find that really inspiring, so I've been thinking about how to implement that practice in my life, but it does beg the question of what to do with the cast-aways. It's just not the same as drawing, where you can just turn the page in your sketch book. It's a (somewhat) functional garment you made, probably for yourself. What do you do with it? Maybe it would be fun to exchange with other seamstresses? You might not love it, but perhaps someone else would?

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    1. Have you seen the quote from Ira Glass about creativity and getting better at your craft? I think it's somewhere in my Pinterest boards, and it is so inspiring when I get fed up with stuff. I totally hear you, though, on the turning a page in the sketchbook! Besides, dresses aren't recyclable and take up more space.

      I would be embarrassed to exchange with anyone, seeing how poorly some of these old garments are made! There are a couple that are fine, just not for me, so maybe I'll keep them around just a little bit longer in hopes of finding a recipient...

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  5. I have a hard time dealing with my "meh" pieces—I have quite a few, from back when I was extremely slapdash in sewing and wanted to take all the shortcuts I could think of. Plus, back then, I didn't really make things from patterns, I just sorta winged it. That leaves me with a number of pieces which don't fit, have wonky details, or are just poorly constructed. I finally decided to get rid of them, though, when I was trying to clean out my sewing room. The "absolute crap" pieces just got tossed. The ones that were salvageable went in the donate bags. There's one shirt in there that I loved, but didn't fit right and had some weird construction errors; it makes me sad to get rid of it, but I know how to make it again, and better, and I even still have the same fabric left over for if/when I decide to remake it.

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    1. Oof, I have so many just-winged-it pieces from early on! I'm beginning to think I need to just suck it up and get rid of them. Reading about other sewists having the courage to do so is helpful. :)

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  6. I totally want set #2! (I left a comment in your last post...hope you can see it.) I promise to try to make it up, and I'll send you a link when it's done. :)

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    1. Hahaha thank you for making set #2 feel better.

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  7. Great post! I can completely relate. I keep holding on to my mediocre pieces, but I've decided that I'm not wearing them anymore, even if that means I don't have enough for me-made months in the future. I hope to recycle them into quilts eventually (10 years from now!).

    I like eating but I DON'T like cooking. I really hate cleaning the bathroom though. :)

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    1. I would love to think I'm going to recycle them into quilts, but considering that half of them are stretch knits, I think it's pretty unlikely...

      Does anyone actually like cleaning the bathroom??

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  8. Interesting post... nearly all of the sewing I do is for my kids, but I stll have the same pull at the heart strings when it comes to sorting through their clothes, even more so as I've watched them being worn. I tend to pass things on to smaller relatives and then when they're outgrown again they'll get donated if they're still wearable. I do wonder where they go and what kind of a life they live after they've left our house...I usually donate to the same charity shop, and I also browse there for things to buy, and every now and then I have a fear that I'll go in and find a whole rack of my handmade items that have remained unsold for months - it's never happened though :)

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    1. Awww, at least your me-made items have a chance at a second life! It makes me think of that dollar-bill tracking project where you can go online to lookup where your bill has gone.

      I thrift regularly, so I have the same fear of seeing my me-mades lingering, unloved...good to know that it hasn't happened for you yet, though!

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  9. I can totally understand your dilemma when it comes to donating your hand sewn lovelies (and former lovelies)! I have a suggestion that might make it easier...maybe...

    I'd recommend that you donate the items directly to a shelter for women instead of a "chain" thrift store. You could also add a little tag to each item to say that the item was handmade with care and/or that the un-serged seams will make it easy to alter. Kind of a pass the love sort of thing... If I didn't have science notebooks to grade, I'd design a tag for you! Maybe, you could also pair up items to make outfits and donate them as a set.

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    1. Thank you for the suggestion! That is an excellent idea, and I will have to bookmark it for when I have non-hideous me-mades to pass on. For now, it's mostly stretched-out knits sewn with straight stitches, so they have no give (I had no idea what I was doing back then!), and I would feel bad trying to foist them on someone.

      Science notebooks are the worst. When I taught ninth-graders, I used to just look at the stacks of notebooks on the desk and feel like crying.

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    2. Could you donate them to a place like a school where the kids need costumes for plays? My friend's grand-daughter needed gowns for a play, so she donated all of her own daughters' old prom gowns, and the kids loved them! Or if there's a place with younger kids, they could go in the "dress up" box. And trust me, the kids won't care what kind of shape they're in!

      And, as for this round of notebooks, it was an optional grade, so the stack is relatively small. Still shocks me when the kids turn in badly done notebooks when they had the option to skip it... Only 8 1/2 more school days until vacation starts!

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  10. If you don't love it, strip it for parts or get rid of it. Done. Purging is good for the soul.
    Oh, and I think CJG's idea is kind of awesome.
    -Sandra

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    1. I totally agree that the aftermath of purging is good for the soul...it's just the during part that wrenches my heart :)

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  11. I love that photo of Walnut!!!!! The one of him deviously licking his lips!!!!

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  12. .. and my goal of Sewing is to improve and learn new techniques. I always have a garment in mind that I would like to learn how to make. Right now my goal is to make a strapless dress with boning and a cape. Once I learn how to, I then make the same style over and over till I get it perfect

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    1. Ooh, boning is not nearly as scary as it sounds! The first time I tried it I was all, pssshhh that's it?

      And both of us know the joy of making McCall's 5845 over and over again :)

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    2. Bored at work so I'm revisiting old posts that i "like"...
      Um, I want to learn to make a COAT, not a CAPE hahaha. Darn iphone.

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  13. Well I have lots of things from when I started sewing that are now in the 'Scrap Pile. Said Scrap Pile is deserving of the title case because its getting BIG. I'm not fussed about the fabrics that went into these garments because they were thrift store finds.

    The point of sewing for me is making a wearable wardrobe. I wear a lot of frosting too so that's not an issue for me. I think I'm at a point where I could do with some formal training. I want to make big things like coats (which is still sitting there with two darts and underlining done only) and have them fit well.

    Anyways, before I go off on a tangent too much (way too easy) - what do you do with your scrap pile?

    Also - slightly unrelated but not...I have a skirt I made in really nice green linen which somehow, stupidly became MUCH too small. And I shoved it into the back of my closet, annoyed that I'd finished it so nice but wondering how it got so tiny as soon as I put the waistband on. But then I thought about it the other day, when I put on one of my other self-made skirts which also originally had the same problem. And back when I'd made it, I'd taken out that dodgy waistband and put another one in that fit better. That skirt gets worn a LOT and is one of my favourite items (this one http://kittysdrawings.com/2011/03/sewing-charcoal-skirt/ ) - so what made me give up on the green one? When the fix is fairly easy.
    You might have written a post on it already - but at what point do we deem something worthy of rejection - or fix it??

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    1. Oh Esz, I am totally with you on so many of the things you said! I love wearing frosting, and mostly I just make it work without any cake. And I, too, have a coat project I am putting off starting because I want it to be worthwhile. And after reading your comment, I feel a little better about not trying to save every scrap of fabric. I have a slowly ballooning scrap pile made up of leftover yardage, and I keep telling myself that I'm going to eventually make a quilt, or a bunch of tiny clutches to give people, but at a certain point I'm going to have to get real with myself...

      I don't have an answer to your when-to-reject question, as I have the same question. Mostly I just stuff it somewhere until I can look at it again without all the bad feelings that where originally associated with it. Then I suck it up and fix it, but sometimes even then it's not my favorite. That's why I ended up giving away a skirt a couple months ago, because it was well-made but a little too small and I didn't love it anymore. I like giving me-mades to other sewists when I can (i.e. not embarrassing quality and shipping budget allows for it) since I know they can appreciate the me-made aspect.

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  14. I like the Mongolian nomad model: they own nothing they do not absolutely need, and what they do own is absolutely beautiful.
    I'd find some charity organization that will give the clothes to those most likely to appreciate them, for their sake as well as yours.

    I'm a lurker, by the way... also a Tengwar note-taker. You make me laugh. And I love the idea of writing a poem round a hem.

    There! If you lived in Rivendell, would you keep these things in your closets?
    I totally relate, though... in Hebrew there is a separate word (chus) for the special love one has for that into which one has put effort.

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    1. That is a brilliant way to live, and thanks for sharing the Hebrew word! What a spectacular concept, and a much-needed one in English. I am going to have to keep that Rivendell admonishment in mind! So glad to meet a fellow Tengwar note-taker, although I have mostly forgotten all of it in the years following college.

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  15. I'm at the stage where I like keeping shoddy projects to remind me of the learning process behind them. At the moment some of them frustrate me so much I'm slowly rebuilding them the right way.

    Do you think that part of the problem with us crafty people is that we know that we COULD improve or make something new with anything we're not happy with? Isn't that the appeal of thrifting? Could you find a charity shop that would sell your early projects, leaving you safe in the knowledge that another creative person will come along, see the potential you saw, and give them a new life?

    I also second Esz, what do you do with your scrap pile?

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    1. Considering my fabric choices early on, I doubt I will try to salvage them or even donate them. I wish there was a creative reuse warehouse here like the ones in the Bay Area, though, as these projects would be perfect for that kind of thing.

      I think knowing that I could make something is a huge part of my problem! See, I always look at ready-made things and think, I'm not going to pay money for that, since I could just make it, but then I have limited time so I don't make it...

      My scrap pile is just growing right now. I'll let you know if I think of something to do with it!

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  16. Wow, you really nailed my thoughts on RTW vs me-made in my wardrobe - I was just thinking about this too! I guess I sew because I do. It's a hobby in every sense of the word. I enjoy thinking about it, planning, making, wearing, but there's never any bigger goal in mind about sustainability or living off the grid or anything like that. I still buy the things I don't want to make (jeans! undergarments!) and I only make things that excite me, whether they be cake or frosting. I do actually wear almost everything I've sucessfully completed, so I haven't had a donation dilemma yet, but I'm sure it's coming.
    And I also hated cooking... until I loved it. I think that when I had every evening off and I HAD to cook, it was a terrible chore, but when I started working evenings and only had 1 or 2 nights off a week, cooking became an event that was planned for all week. I love eating good food, and somewhere along the line I decided that I would make it to eat it and enjoy both aspects of it!

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Thank you for taking the time to tell me your thoughts! I appreciate reading them and I try to reply to most, if not all, comments, especially when they are questions. I ask that you keep your comments polite, and if you're a spammer, don't bother because your comment will just be deleted! Also, if you're commenting on a post that's more than two weeks old, it will be moderated.